When people come together… conflict will happen.

Understanding conflict styles is a key component of conflict management.

We tend to think that others deal with conflict the same way we do… and then we are shocked when the “strategic” way we have chosen to deal with the difficult situation at hand, does not work.

Why is that?

It’s often because we are not using the same conflict style and/or are not aware that the person we are trying to resolve a problem with, is using a different style.

The Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Model is useful to understand, when dealing with conflict. The model suggests that there are five different ways people deal with conflict.

I think we all want to cooperate, but left to our natural tendencies we often revert to the style of dealing with conflict that we learned growing up. And unless we had a perfect childhood (anyone, anyone?) it might not be all that useful as an adult!

So, it’s worth learning about the different conflict styles so we can understand our natural tendency, and notice where those around us are operating from. When we do that, we can have better outcomes. We can be sensitive to both the goals, and the people involved.

The Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Model has stood the test of time. It was developed in the 1970’s and is still used today.

The 5 Conflict Styles are:

1. Competing
2. Avoiding
3. Accommodating
4. Collaborating
5. Compromising

Each of these have elements of Assertiveness, and Cooperativeness. It’s interesting to think about how these different styles can interact with each other.  Here’s a chart from Management Weekly

You may want to think about a situation you are dealing with. Which of the following 5 conflict styles are at play?

High Assertive Styles

1. Competing – Very direct and assertive.
2. Collaborating – We use this when we feel we are on the same team. Teamwork and joint problem solving are at work

Low Assertive Styles

3. Avoiding – Stepping away from the conflict altogether.
4. Accommodating – One side accommodates the other side’s needs.

Compromising Style

5. Compromising – This style involves finding middle ground and agreeing to disagree in certain areas, but coming together in others. The overall goal is met, both sides have won and lost something in the process. This style requires both sides to be moderately cooperative and moderately assertive.

   All the styles are useful, at times. When conflict is causing problems, it’s useful to take a step back and see how we can help manage the situation in a more productive manner, keeping the end goal in mind.

Do you have a culture of appreciation?

This week I’ve been starting off my client meetings with a question. “Who in your life are you appreciating right now?”

I’ve loved hearing the answers.

I’ve also asked how they think their company is at showing appreciation. Seems like the consensus is… there’s room for improvement!

Why is it important to show appreciation? I’ve thought a lot about this, and I think the simple answer is, it feeds the soul.

Think about how you feel when someone appreciates you. Do you feel seen? Do you feel like what you did made a difference in someone’s life? And then what? Does it make you want to keep doing whatever it was that preceded that appreciation? And how do you feel about the person who gave you this gift of appreciation?

I encourage all business leaders to really consider these questions.

The next step is to create a strategy around incorporating employee appreciation in the workplace. Here are a few ideas.

• Start meetings with words of appreciation
• Have an Appreciation Jar, provide a way for employees to appreciate each other
• Host employee appreciation events
• Write a thank you note
• Take someone out to lunch and tell them what you appreciate about them

It’s important to remember that people are all different and like to be appreciated in different ways. A great book on this subject is The 5 Languages of Appreciation in the Workplace.

A highly sensitive person (HSP) is a term for those who are thought to have an increased or deeper central nervous system sensitivity to physical, emotional, or social stimuli.

According to Dr. Elaine Aron, clinical research psychologist and author of the national bestseller, The Highly Sensitive Person: How to Thrive When the World Overwhelms You, people with this trait make up 15-20% of the population. Which means, HSP’s are in the workplace. And thank goodness they are!

Although HSP’s are often misunderstood, we are starting to understand how with just a little care, these people can truly make the workplace better. HSP’s do have some challenges that others don’t. They can get overstimulated easily by bright lights, loud noises, and a hectic workflow. However, with some minor adjustments, being more sensitive than others is not a bad thing. In fact, it is a very necessary thing. HSP’s bring some very positive traits to the workplace. They tend to be creative, good at seeing the big picture, inventive problem solvers, and have a very good eye for detail. They also tend to relate well to others and have a highly developed sense of empathy.

To learn more about the HSP trait, please visit, www.hsperson.com

The kidneys are responsible for converting tadalafil generic cialis citrulline in cucumber to arginine which is then converted into nitric oxide. The heart does not show its function cialis buy as it should do. Von Willebrand factor is a protein that functions as a “carrier” for generic viagra line coagulation factor VIII. The first time buyers should be allowed to include repair costs in the tadalafil soft tabs loans.
 

As with just about everything else this year, the way performance evaluations will happen this year, will need to be adjusted. A good place to start is with a couple questions. How has the pandemic affected your business? How has the pandemic affected your employees? With that lens you can begin to move forward. Some […]